Dobby or Slobby?

Everyone has heard about Dobby the House Elf in Harry Potter. I hope you have one and that you are kind and considerate to your house-elf. Most of us non-residents of the Potterworld are not so fortunate.Dobby

Our houses are inhabited by Dobby’s evil twin, Slobby. Where a house-elf goes about cleaning up and tidying, the house-imp is responsible for all the irritating things for which, up until now, you have probably blamed your partner or kids.

WHO…

1 leaves the milk bottle with only a quarter of an inch in it and does not get out another one?

2 generously bestows you a lavatory roll with only two sheets of paper remaining while there are a pile of fresh ones just out of arm’s reach?

3 steals a vital ingredient for the meal you had planned which you notice just five minutes after the shops have closed?

4 sneaks in and fills up the vacuum cleaner when you know that you emptied it last time?

5 gleefully takes freshly laundered towels, makes them damp and throws them on the bathroom floor?

6 delights in picking up your carefully-squeezed toothpaste and squishes it in the middle of the tube?

7 crawls into your underwear drawer, mixes all the socks up, puts them in unmatched pairs and then steals two unmatched ones?

8 leaves bread/toast crumbs all over the cutting board and butter dish?

9 methodically stacks dirty dishes on top of the dishwasher instead of inside it?

It’s Slobby, that’s who. So before you have another steaming row with your spouse or teenagers, have a look down the side of the sofa, because that is where Slobby lives with his hoard of treasure – loose change, remote controls, sweeties, piles of fluff and that crochet hook you could never find.

Congratulations – you are the proud owner of a house-imp.

toilet roll


4 thoughts on “Dobby or Slobby?

  1. Hi Ailsa,

    I have a Slobby with a key fetish, he or she loves hiding things too, like the cream for bites and stings and my lids for the tubs I have just filled with home made tomato sauce! I used to put it down to the resident ghost, but it would seem I was mistaken – or perhaps Slobby and Grandma’s ghost are in cahoots! Alain’s brother brought me a tub of peaches, tiny little things, all bruised and battered an Alain is expecting me to make chutney from them, it’s going to take hours to peel them all for 1kg of useable fruit which will make about 4 jars of chutney. Timewise, it will be the most expensive chutney I have made this year and it will be cutting into my writing time!

    How’s you and yours? I’d like to say I’m steaming along with GOD, but that would be fibbing. More like trickling along slowly, oh well maybe I will make less mistakes at this pace.

    I am reading a book at the moment which right up until the last couple of chapters had been error free…then the author let himself down by using the feminine version of Francoise for a man, five times in the same chapter and then repeats the opening chapter in full for the third time…Not sure what he was thinking of there, error, or does he think we needed reminding…it’s a pity, because apart from his terrible choice of names for his female characters, (their dogs all have cool names by the way) the story is good, maybe the bit about Hitler being alive and well and living in Buenos Aires up until the 1980’s is a bit hard to swallow, but not impossible so I overlooked that one, but he lost a thread somewhere too, as the person who had a contract out on them wasn’t one of 4 names on the list I had made as I read between the lines. Maybe it will become clearer as I read on…I just hope I don’t come across the first chapter again! It was nominated for some award too…? Wish me luck, I may be more confused when I finish the book than when I started…but I just finished reading Absolute Power, David Baldacci, and in this book I found an error, he wrote the decreased, when he’d meant the deceased! Simon and Schuster’s proof readers missed that pearler!

    Take care,

    Sharon

    On Wed, Oct 2, 2013 at 3:43 PM, Ailsa Abrah

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