It’s a bit of a handicap having a certain amount of medical knowledge. I tend to self-diagnose which, as I was a veterinary nurse, means that I’ve had distemper twice and rabies a few times. I also know the side-effects of medicines by heart.
My problem at the moment is that I am not sure about the migraines. I’d never had one until the time the woman smashed into my car last November, causing a stroke. I was only sent for a scan because I suffered unbearable migraines for a couple of months afterwards.
Since my motorbike crash they’ve come back. I don’t want any more MRI scans because I’m sure being bombarded with rays doesn’t do one any good. I’ve had quite a few recently. The only thing that touches them is Zaldiar which is the French brand-name for Tramadol. Yes, they can be highly-addictive if taken too often. The other awkward part is that they wake me up to the point that I am bouncing off the walls because I feel better. The relief of pain is one of the biggest highs in the world (trust me, I’m an expert). Of course, if I haven’t taken them til the pain is dreadful, that means by bed-time I’m not at all ready to sleep.
So don’t take the Tramadol, you say. Well, the pain-killers prescribed for my migraines some time ago were almost pure opium and caffeine – another lethally addictive combination but those sent me to sleep for 18 hours at a time. Effective against migraines but useless for a fully-functioning life.
I shall go and see Seb, my adorable GP. He will probably want to prove that I have (or have not) had a mini-stroke from the bike crash. I really don’t care – they can’t do anything about them but I suppose it should be on my records. He may give me more of the opium … but you see my dilemma?
Please don’t say that if you were a vet you’d consider putting me to sleep…we kept worse cases going for years! *Looks pathetic and lays paw on your knee*