You know what I hate about clichés? A great way to write lazily, obviously and avoids the need to be innovative, of course …. but mainly I loathe them because they are true. Except …
In one second my whole life came crashing down – piffle! I am a disaster-magnet and very rarely does anything happen in one go to ruin your existence! Believe me. In my experience it is much more like wearing a huge sombrero, standing under balconies with small children lobbing pebbles into the brim. The effect is cumulative.
Take my absence from social media for the last few months. Please do, I wish someone would, they have not been fun.
It started with a biggie which would have floored most people. My husband, having been diagnosed with terminal untreatable cancer, asked me not to let him go into hospital and his specialist put me in charge as his sole carer.
It was one of those unthinking “of course, darling” answers. Never one to shirk my duty I assumed the responsibility without much reflection on what the ramifications might be. You, dear reader, being an intelligent sort, have already worked out that my life is no longer my own and Milord will come first for the foreseeable future.
First there is the family. Like everyone else’s, we have had fall-outs, disputes and not been on speaking terms for years at a time. It didn’t cross my mind that rels who hadn’t sent a Christmas card in years would want to come back.
OK that was a wonderful lesson to me. I have changed. I’m not the same person I was ten years ago and not defined by one bit of bad behaviour so why should other people be? I decided that I was cursed with too good a memory and a bad case of Scottish vendetta which makes the Mafia look like amateurs. It was a liberating experience to find that “life really is too short”. It’s a big improvement.
Had my other half shown instant symptoms it might have been easier. He is currently doing a marvellous impression of a fit 80-year-old with “nasty turns” coming on unexpectedly, suddenly and frighteningly. Right, he’s had these for a long time but they are becoming nastier and more frequent.
It hit me hardest when I had to cancel a trip to London I had hoped to fit in before he was too ill to leave alone. This would have been my last chance for a solo trip. Eh well, I don’t mind but it brought it home to me. I have a job.
My own health hit the skids and we had to do a job-swap. I have been fighting pneumonia when people in the next room can hear me breathing in, and bronchitis which just makes me sicken others with my coughing.
So it has been a merry game of tag while we decide who is in the worse state and who is duty nurse.
I just have not had the oomph to go on line and be jolly. I hate being depressive and bringing everyone else down so it has been hard to find much to say that was positive. Given that my writing career appeared (at one point) to be hitting the skids as well….let’s just say that not everything is lost and I’m looking forward to getting back onto social media and concentrating on laughs, publicity and my new adventure in writing.
Overture, curtains and beginners, please!