Below is a photograph of a sufferer of the newly-discovered condition which translates as furniture attraction.

I may look as if I had been set on by a gang of thugs in the east end but all it took was two mugs, a small table and a little help from Lily-dogge. Nothing broken but a real shiner on my left eye which is why it is holding a gauze of lavender oil, a badly twisted neck and severe scrapes and grazes. The hospital kept me in overnight but said that my concussion wasn’t bad enough to keep me in, I am very used to being wobbly.

Badger had moved his sitting-out area to the front so I bought smaller chairs. Then I found a kids’ table set which would do fine for out-door nibbling.  Of course I take a while to get used to the position of new furniture so the neighbours were not at all surprised when I came out of the garage door, tripped on the table, booted the poor hound and then smashed my face onto the two mugs of tea I was carrying. They phoned an ambulance and rushed over to pick me up screaming “Check on the dog!”

So I am indoors for a few days slathered in essential oils. If I wear a pirate eye patch any more people will think I am changing occupations again!

Oh what fun one can have with ordinary objects!


11 thoughts on “Spellexitis

  1. Hahahahahahaaaa!
    Mistress, you’re a liability….
    Pirates had lavender eye patches?
    I see no reason why not. Make them think of delightful damsels while they do their dastardly deeds upon the seas. Short on seas down your way. Bet the old Badger has had a chortle out of your trip.
    Is Lilydogge alright? Expect so. Hope so.
    Catch up with you soon, Ailsa.
    I’m due for some respite soon.
    I don’t recall being this wicked….

  2. Ever since my experiences with my first wife I have considered the coffee mug as potentially an offensive weapon and this is just one more example where training would have prevented a catastrophe

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